But there have been many studies that show IQ only accounts for about 20% of our success in any field. The major attributes of success are our social and emotional intelligence. Yet there is very little emphasis put on emotional intelligence. Only a handful of schools have any formal programs that address emotional intelligence.
In his book Emotional Intelligence, Daniel Goleman says, "People with well-developed emotional skills are also more likely to be content and effective in their lives, mastering the habits of the mind that foster their own productivity; people who cannot marshal some control over their emotional life fight battles that sabotage their ability for focused work and clear thought."
We have an emotional mind and a rational mind. In large part, our emotional mind developed to help us survive. When man first wandered the earth anytime he encountered some new experience, he needed to make instant decisions about whether the encounter involved something that he could eat or something that might try and eat him. To rely on the rational mind, which works much slower than the emotional mind, might have meant the end of mankind. The emotional mind springs into action much quicker than the rational mind. But unless we learn to control the emotional mind, we will make lots of bad decisions and poor choices.
It is more focused on how a person understands, recognizes, and chooses his values. It shows how good a person is in understanding others, and how good he is in making decisions. It is how good a person can apply what he learned to be happy, how a person can love and interact with others.
Studies show that it is not the IQ or Intelligence Quotient of a person which is responsible in attaining success in life. EQ or Emotional Quotient is the main factor responsible for a person's success in all aspects of life.
Unlike Intelligence Quotient, Emotional Quotient is present to everyone. It only needs to be developed. Developing Emotional Quotient can help in decision-making, and in building good relationships with other people. It focuses more in attaining intangible success in life. Success is attaining by knowing how to deal with emotions, feelings, and interactions with others.
It has been proven that attaining material success does not promise personal contentment. Success is defined as being contented, happy and satisfied in life. In 1990, Emotional Quotient was introduced in the world market, affirming that a person's ability to handle relationships and his ability to use the appropriate emotions in every interaction are much more important than a person's intelligence quotient.
A person who has a high emotional quotient score is expected to be more positive in life. Emotional Quotient gives a person courage to stand again after a fall. Emotional Quotient gives person strength to face fear. Being worried, always in doubt, accepting mistakes, and admitting mistakes are just some of the challenges people in any field of work or life face.
And what about our bodies? They are as intelligent as our minds. I think the question worth asking is, "Do people give their bodies the same opportunities to smarten up?" We know bodies can think and feel. In fact, our bodies go beyond both cognition and emotion. They are highly expressive, they remember often what our brains don't, and they know things out of sheer instinct before we do.
Even body language is well researched and understood. But again, it comes from a cognitive point of view as it explains nonverbal communication with others. What about when your body is trying to speak to you? Do you listen? I mean, really listen. Without thinking, without emotion, do you know what your body wants, needs, or has to say? Or, put differently, what kind of relationship do you have with your body? When considering that it has the power to provide the greatest pleasures and impose unbearable pain, one would think that answering this question would be a top priority. But sadly, it is not.
The body requires as much respect in order to be "smart" as the brain needs "exercise" to be strong. You just have to keep moving.... and listen. In this respect, dancing is a way of allowing our bodies express our feelings and talking to us in the process.
1. Self-awareness: Recognizing your emotions and their effects; knowing your strengths and limitations; and having a strong sense of your capabilities and self-worth.
2. Self-regulation: Managing your moods by keeping disruptive emotions and impulses in check; and channeling your feelings and resources to enhance your performance and productivity.
3. Self-motivation: Knowing how to use your emotions to propel yourself into action toward a desired goal and to persevere despite obstacles and setbacks.
4. Empathy: Your ability to sense others' feelings and perspectives; read and understand the dynamics of relationships; and anticipate, recognize and meet key constituents' needs.
5. Social skills: Your adeptness at inducing desirable responses in others through communication, collaboration, influence and relationship-building.
Unlike IQ, which is pretty much established at birth, EQ can be learned, implemented and improved upon at any age. In fact, studies show our emotional intelligence increases as we get older -- peaking between 50 and 59.
What's the best way to raise your EQ, short of hiring a personal coach?
Psychologist Dr. Hendrie Weisinger, author of "Emotional Intelligence at Work" and "The Emotionally Intelligent Financial Advisor," advocates increasing your self-awareness. Since dancing deals with self awareness, emotions and motivation, it can be used to develop EQ.
He advises taking a reading of your emotions several times throughout the day and keeping a journal. After a week, access what you're feeling, how you're channeling your feelings and how it affects your workday.
If you're sending yourself negative messages, plant positive ones in their place. For example, if you find you're telling yourself "I'm stupid" after making a mistake, replace that message with "What can I do differently next time?"
Commit to responsibilities. This drives a person not to give up. It is also a way of earning other people's trust.
Take personal accountability. Being accountable is being dependable.
Identify comfort zones. Trying to escape these comfort zones can make a person explore other things.
Identify fears and try facing them. Doing this can develop self-confidence. It can attain assurances that anything can be overcome.
Practice being humble. Accepting mistakes in life attains high self-esteem.
It also helps to have an EQ role model. Identify people you know who excel as individuals and also maximize a team's potential through building bonds, collaboration and creating group synergy in pursuit of collective goals.
Watch how they sell their ideas, handle criticism from others, and deal with setbacks. Then apply those skills in your own life and see what a difference it makes.